RedvsBlue of the Dead
by General RTS
Summary: RedvsBlue Crossover- This is the worst summary... ever... of all time


**Author:** Honestly, you would think a guy has to get hyped up on drugs to think of an idea like this yet all it took was a weekend rotting my brain with videogames and manga to think of it.

I was rewatching some old RedvsBlue episodes came across the 'Zombie Plan' episode. Recently I've been rewatching the entire series of Highschool of the Dead (manga and anime) and I thought, 'What would happen if the characters of RedvsBlue were thrown into the Highschool of the Dead world. Of course, the problem was how to do that in a way that made sense. A few ideas came and went and finally I decided that instead of the actual RvB characters, what about a parody of those characters? So you have this random crack.

**Situation**

Once upon a time, in the city of Austin Texas, there were two highschools that existed with bitter rivalry with one another. On one side, there was West Side High, whose school colors and mascot, the Red Knights, were a bright shade of red. On the other side, there was East Side High, whose own colors were, in contrast to those of West Side High, a deep blue. One day, the two schools decided, that in order to make amends with one another, they would each send a group of representative students in a student exchange to Japan. The comprehensive list of students are named below.

* * *

**West Side High**

Pres a.k.a Sarge McSarge, the student council president of West Side High.

Dick Simmons, the student council secretary and teacher's pet.

Dexter Grif, the lazy delinquent and failed repeater.

Lopez, the Spanish Transfer Student who, for an inexplicable reason, was immediately named Vice-President by Pres, (No one ever bothered asking his last name)

Donut, the queer… nuff said.

**East Side High**

Leonard Church, the student council president of East Side High.

Lavernius Tucker, vice-president of East Side High

Michael J. Caboose, the mentally handicapped student.

Sister, a.k.a Kaikaina Grif, Grif's younger sister who attends East high after filling out the wrong forms.

Doc, a.k.a Frank DuFresne, School Nurse and Caboose's social helper.

* * *

This is their story, their adventure in a world ridden with zombies… let the hilarity begin

o0o

The plane rumbled against the turbulence of the wind, making both passengers and crew alike jerk against their seats in mild discomfort from within. Along the many rows of seats inside this particular plane rested a certain group of students from West Side High, chatting of course, about their upcoming trip to Japan.

"Men… and Grif," Sarge said, taking the lead as he usually did. "I know that none of us feel comfortable about going on a dual exchange program with those dirty blues," he spat to the side in disgust at the slang term the students of West Side students invented for the East Side counterparts, leaving a blob of spit in the aisle. "but unfortunately this is an order from command."

"Wait… Command?" asked Simmons, "Don't you mean the school, Pres?"

"The two are the same thing, Simmons." Sarge answered confidently. "What greater command could there be than the glorious school of West Side High."

"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZ"

"Grif stop sleeping," Sarge yelled, knocking the back of Grif's head rest, jerking him from his slumber. "I'm trying to be epic back here."

"I'm on an airplane! I'm supposed to be sleeping!" Grif retorted angrily.

"Not when we're having a strategy meeting you're not!" Sarge berated the lazy delinquent.

"Strategy? What strategy?" A bewildered Grif asked. "We're going on a two week exchange program in Japan, not a freaking battlefield!"

"Ohhhhh, suuuurrree." Sarge agreed sardonically, "We're only going on a two week sabbatical with the _dirtiest, most treacherous group of blues in the history of all blues!"_

"Hey assholes, we can hear you from back here." called the student president of those said blues, Leonard Church, from the back of the plane.

"Oh suck it, blues!" Simmons yelled from the front of the plane as he flipped the bird back at the students of East Side High.

"Hey! Fuck you reds!" Church yelled back repeating the same gesture.

"Yeah, fuck you, you sons of bitches!" Sister joined in enthusiastically.

"Hey! I'm your bother moron!" Grif protested. "Stop calling mom a bitch!"

"Anyways, " Sarge said turning back from what was quickly degenerating into a shouting contest. "The main point is that we should be prepared. Japan is uncharted and unexplored territory.

"That's not true." Simmons said flatly. "… In any way… Whatsoever."

"Who know what kind of backwards, primitive society we'll meet once we're there!"

"Actually," Simmons corrected. "Japan is a pretty advanced nation with the newest and most innovative technology."

"Oh I love meeting new people!" Donut gushed. "Especially the Japanese. They were the guys that gave us Karaoke, Dance Dance Revolution and Yaoi Hentai!"

Everybody stopped.

"… Wait, what was that last one?" Simmons asked sincerely hoping he had somehow misheard.

"En serio, deberíamos echarle bajar del avión. (Seriously, we should just throw him off the plane)" That was Lopez, the Spanish transfer student, of course.

"Lopez is right." Sarge agreed, "We need to remember that the blues are still our greatest enemies. The fact that we're in Japan changes nothing."

"Odio a todos. (I hate you all)"

"Well, at least we'll be better prepared than the blues." Simmons commented. "We did have all those Japanese Language courses after all."

"Oh shit! We were actually supposed to be listening to those? Grif asked as he settled back down. "I thought those were sleeping periods!"

Sarge sighed. "You know Grif, it's come to the point where I'm not even disappointed in you anymore."

"Thank you, Pres."

"Shut up, dirtbag. It wasn't a compliment."

"Did you take those classes?" Grif asked skeptically.

"Of course not!" Sarge answered looking horrified at the idea. "That's why I have Simmons. A leader needs to devote his time to more important things… like fighting the blues… or finding ways to kill off lazy and insubordinate subordinates."

_'Oh shit!' _Church, who had overheard the conversation, thought _'I didn't even think about having to learn Japanese!' _He looked over at his vice president beside him. "Tucker! Hey, Tucker!"

Unfortunately, Tucker had been preoccupied with hitting on the plane's stewardess… and failing.

"Hey baby," Tucker greeted as an attractive stewardess came down the aisle to pour drinks. "Do these peanuts come warm?"

"Errrrr, no sir. I don't think they do." she replied.

"Well, then can you to warm _my_ nuts? Bow Chika Bo- OW!" screamed Tucker as Church ranked on his ear.

"Tucker, focus!" Church hissed. "We're going to a foreign nation and we have no idea how to speak their language!"

"Oh relax, dude." Tucker said dismissively. "Doc speaks tons of languages and he said he'd take care of it."

"… That answer does nothing whatsoever to calm me." Church replied flatly. "Don't you remember what happened the last time we went on a trip outside of America and had Doc translate. The locals wouldn't stop smacking us with raw fish." They looked over at the person in question who was currently having a conversation with Caboose.

"Caboose there's nothing wrong with what you feeling now." the nurse assured . "All boys go through puberty." Like most things in life, this confused Caboose.

"All boy go through what?" Caboose asked.

"Puberty." Doc reiterated.

"… I can make up words too, you know."

"Caboose how are babies made?" Doc asked, determined to get his message through to Caboose.

"When two people love each other very much, a bird comes and gives them a surpris-"

"Never mind, it all makes sense." Doc cut him off, feeling a small part of himself die inside.

Tucker leaned towards Church and whispered. "Didn't you say that you taught Caboose about those things."

"Yeah, but I left out the important bits." Church whispered back. "Honestly can you imagine what would happen if Caboose tried to _breed_."

Unfortunately Tucker did try to imagine it.

In.

Great.

And.

Excruciating.

_Detail._

"… I see your point." Tucker admitted, sounding a bit more hollow than he did before. "Good call."

"Yeah, but already dodged crises aside," Church said, bringing them back to their previous conversation. "what are we going to do about the whole language thing?"

"Tons of people all over the world speak English." Tucker pointed out. "It aren't that hard. I'm sure there are tons of people in Japan that can speak it. Honestly, what's the worst that could possibly happen while we're there?"

***One Day Later***

Church glared at Tucker. "You just had to fucking ask didn't you?"

* * *

**Author:** For now, this is only a oneshot I felt like doing on a whim. I have no plans for this story whatsoever though that might change depending on the initial feedback this gets. If you want to adopt this or give me ideas feel free to leave a review or just PM me.


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